Naturally, every parent wants their children to be happy, healthy, and safe, but since parenting comes with no clear set of rules, how do we set about accomplishing this? It has much to do with what we choose to incorporate from our own parents, our values systems, our support systems, and our situations in life. But also, our personality style and natural tendencies in communication. To go one step further, our children are people too, so they also have personality styles, specific needs and fears, and natural tendencies in communication. By understanding our own styles and those of our children, we can increase communication, anticipate insecurities, and avoid some very predictable conflicts. Below is a very brief breakdown based on primary DISC styles.
The D-Style Parent (THE BOSS)
These parents are determined, hard working, competitive, and energetic. D-parents are often busy parents, surrounding themselves with tasks and activities. They focus on problem solving and big picture solutions, focusing less on the emotions behind something or the reasons why…as long as the end result is positive. They do not respond well to dramatic or emotional displays. The D-parent will strive to be a figure of authority and to be a good role-model for their children. However, if their authority is challenged or they feel disrespected or taken advantage of, they will likely display strong tone and body language.
Food for Thought for D-Style Parents:
The I-Style Parent (THE COMMUNICATOR)
These parents are energetic, expressive, fun, and communicative. They love to be the center of attention, and enjoy when others are smiling, interacting, and being creative. They are very focused on people. The I-style likely struggles with organization, details, time management, and especially rejection. As they will want to be accepted by others, and their children, they will likely struggle with being the disciplinarian or one who has to say “no”. This style encourages being in touch with one's emotions. They are open, spontaneous, flexible, and giving.
Food for Thought for I-Style Parents:
The S-Style Parent (THE NURTURER)
These parents are stable, selfless, patient, and calm. They strive for peaceful relationships and environments, and will put others' needs before their own in order to achieve this. ;The S-style will avoid conflict with others, as it causes them intense stress, which they will likely internalize. They create a strong sense of security and grounding for their children and are very committed and loyal to their families. As they dislike change, they may also become stubborn or inflexible in their ways.
Food for Thought for the S-Style Parent:
The C-Style Parent (THE ORGANIZER)
These parents are organized, modest, task-oriented and logical. They will teach their children to find out how and why things are how they are, to gather information, and look at the details before deciding. They often will put systems in place for things to run smoothly, but may be inflexible when it comes to changing these systems. They are independent and creative people, who can see into the details and analyze a situation based on information. However, others may perceive them as withdrawn or unemotional and may have a difficult time getting close. They will avoid conflict and also seek out peaceful and stable environments.
Food for Thought for the C-Style Parent:
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